It started out as most of my interactions do: I saw her profile, liked what I saw, and wrote her a message. I attached my showcase key with the message, because you pretty much have to. (If you don’t, they assume you’re trying to hide something. The women want to know what you look like right away – nobody is claiming that looks don’t matter on that site.)
As I say, this is how the vast majority of my interactions go, so everything is normal so far. She responded with a message, and attached her own showcase key to it. Her message was very simple:
U look much taller in your pic.Obviously that’s not her real B-B-M PIN (in case anyone reading this is really, really dumb), but it brings me to an interesting point: at the time when I was interacting with this woman, B-B-M was suddenly super popular with everyone on A-M. I had multiple women wanting to communicate with me over B-B-M, and was told by some of them that they in turn had only installed it because so many men were wanting to use it. I don’t know why B-B-M had become the go-to instant messaging platform, but at least it wasn’t as bad as Yahoo Messenger, so I wasn’t complaining much. (When I was really lucky a woman would be using Google Hangouts, but, unfortunately for me, that was rare.)
I have bbm pin:XXX
Would love to learn more about you
Anyway, let’s take that message from back to front. (That almost sounds sexual, but it really isn’t.)
- “Would love to learn more about you” is pretty normal, boilerplate messaging.
- “I have bbm pin:XXX” is very concise – to the point that she can’t even be bothered with grammar. I don’t usually make fun of people’s grammar, but it’s weird, in retrospect, because all of my messages from her after this were much more articulate, so this one little sentence is a weird blip in our interactions.
- “U look much taller in your pic” is just fucking bizarre. I’m 5’4”, but in my profile I said that I’m 5’6”. (It’s the one lie in my profile. I’m pretty honest about pretty much everything I say on A-M, but everyone lies on this site, and for men it’s height. For women it’s weight.) So if I claimed to be two inches taller than I actually am, how in hell do I look taller in my pic? It just doesn’t make sense.
I got her message on a Saturday night, but at the time I was already madly messaging someone else on B-B-M – not to mention figuring out to use B-B-M in the first place1 – so I didn’t have time to properly respond. But on Sunday morning I sent a message back to tell her that I’d add her on B-B-M, and then did so. (I’m a man of my word.) I wasn’t able to message her very much that day, I was busy doing numerous things and so was she, but we did exchange a few messages.
Monday was better, we exchanged messages all day long. Some were flirty, some were just humorous, some were personal. It was a good, solid connection, and I was feeling very hopeful, because that type of connection doesn’t always come up. In fact, I was concurrently having that kind of connection with another woman – the one I’d been messaging on Saturday – so I was starting to get ahead of myself with visions of dating two women at once.
Side note: Dating two women at once has almost happened to me a few times, and for some reason that has made it become a sort of goal for me. I don’t actually have any desire to date multiple women at the same time, except that it would give me bragging rights, which is a really douche-y reason to want anything.
Back to the story:
The thing is… it was really easy with this woman. Like… crazy easy. Maybe too easy. She laughed at my jokes, she said all the right things in every single circumstance… in retrospect, it was weird how smoothly it had all progressed. Even in the best connections I’ve had, there have been disagreements, or I’ve said things that the woman didn’t understand and I had to rephrase myself, or she said something nutty, or something to make things a little bit less smooth. But with this woman, there was never a blip, not a speed bump, not even a slight breeze to nudge me off the course of having an easy relationship with a woman who wanted to cheat. Oh, and who had an I-U-D – just sayin.
It was so smooth that I asked if she was available to meet Monday evening, but she wasn’t available and had to decline. It’s always a long shot to ask someone at the very last minute like that, but I try anyway, because if nothing is ventured nothing can be gained.
Tuesday was quieter. I wasn’t able to message her much, and neither was she able to message me. (Though I did manage to message the other woman I had on the go at the time, so there may have been some level of prioritization going on.) I did ask her if she was available to meet, again, but she wasn’t.
I worked late that Tuesday, leaving the office around 8PM. When I got home I noticed that she was no longer showing up in my B-B-M list, but I didn’t know if that was bad or not. The other woman I’d been messaging had also disappeared from my account at one point, only to re-add me again later on, and I didn’t really know B-B-M well enough by that point to know the nuances of someone disappearing from your contact list. I checked my A-M-related email account and found that I had a message from her, so I went to A-M, and unfortunately the message turned out to be her revoking her photos. This wasn’t necessarily bad, it’s happened before – sometimes people will go in and do a mass cleaning, revoking all of the keys they’ve sent, and she might have forgotten which profile was me – but realistically, yes, it probably was bad.
Just to be safe, I figured I’d revoke my photos, as well (I always reciprocate when someone does that), and the easiest way to do that in the mobile site is to go to the person’s profile and revoke your key from there, so I tried to do so, only to find that she’d blocked me, so that I can’t view her profile or send her messages.
So in the span of an hour, I’d gone from an instant, deep, smooth, easy connection, to BAM! Blocked.
Conclusions
So what can we conclude from this? Actually… nothing much. I can think of a number of reasons why she might have blocked me, some are good, some are bad, some are horrible, but I have no information to know which (if any) of these reasons are true.For example, off the top of my head, here are some reasons I can think of why she suddenly blocked me:
- Her husband discovered her A-M account (or something else nefarious), and she was madly cleaning house2.
- She never really liked me in the first place, and was “faking it” when she was getting along with me so well in B-B-M, so she finally just got tired of me.
- She had been chatting with multiple men, finally settled on one (who wasn’t me), and decided to discard the rest.
- When I had originally sent my message, with my photos, she never actually looked at them, and on Tuesday she finally got around to it, gagged at my ugliness, and blocked and deleted me as fast as her fingers could go.
- This theory doesn’t align perfectly with the facts before us – I refer you back to the comment about me looking taller in my photos – but it has the advantage of being very mean about my looks, which lends it credence.
- Everything had been going very smoothly, but the last thing I said to her on Tuesday was so insulting to her that she blocked me in disgust. (I don’t remember the last thing I said to her, but I’m reasonably sure this isn’t what happened.)
- She had been waiting and waiting for me to ask her to come and bone me, I mean really asking, not doing it at the last minute when it’s too late, and when I kept not doing it, she assumed it was because I was boning someone else and just stringing her along.
No comments:
Post a Comment